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Collywobs

Collywobs
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Member since: 02.07.2000

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      02.08.2001 04:38
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      Eight years ago, whilst 5 months pregnant with our second child, I noticed I couldn't hear as good as usual. I thought I probably needed my ears syringing or I had an infection. No such luck for me, I was sent for lots of hearing tests and was then told that I had lost half of my hearing. What do you do when you are told something like that, well, I spent around a couple of weeks feeling so sorry for myself, wallowing in self pity. Then it hit me harder, I sank into a depression seeing no way for me to communicate, I shut myself away, thinking that there would be no point seeing anyone if I could not understand them, the truth was, I was scared stiff, I didn't know what to do. Finally I got the kick up the backside that I needed, I had to think about what I would do when my 2nd child arrives. First the television went and a new tele with teletext was bought, then it was social services to see if they could help me in any way, they fitted a flashing door bell and the lights would flash if the phone rang, they also fitted a flashing smoke detector. Feeling rather stupid I went to see about hearing aids, and was pleasantly surprised at how much back ground noise they picked up. I carried on like this and learned to lip read, my husband also learned to lip speak along with my family and my sons, things got better and I was established in my way of life. As the years have gone on, more and more of my hearing has gone. I am now classed as profoundly deaf, on my last hearing test I heard just one sound, when I asked about the sound the audiologist told me it was equivalent to Concorde taking off, I had to laugh, the thought of me hearing concorde taking off. Earlier this year I was given a chance to try some new more powerful hearing aids. There was nothing to loose and everything to gain so I jumped at the offer. They were ordered and finally ready for me to try. I put them in and turned them on, straight away, I could hear everything going on around me, even paper rustling, I cried I was so happy. When I got home the first thing I heard was my youngest sons voice, I just stood there bawling my eyes out. That was the first time I had EVER heard his voice, it is the most amazing thing that will always stick in my mind, my sons also now had to come to terms with me being able to hear them. I still need to lip read to understand the sounds but we really have some fun, they would play games, whispering to test my new ears(what they call them) out testing to see if I could really hear them. They were just as amazed as I was. One thing I did notice was that almost everyone shouted at me, I kept asking "why are you shouting?", some people just laughed when they finally realised what I meant. Others failed to understand me. It's quite simple and goes for all people who are profoundly deaf-- A deaf person will NOT hear you however loud you shout, how can they, they are deaf. Some people who may be slightly hard of hearing, MAY need you to speak up. A person who has the same hearing problem as me, nerve deafness, may well need to lip read. I did ask why my hearing went like this, and I was told I must have bad genes, I know nothing of that subject so won't dwell on it. There are people who really do want to communicate. I've wrote the following just to show how I ask people to communicate with me. How can you help people who are deaf? These are MY ways. First, please ask if we lip read, I always say to everyone "I'm deaf and need to lip read". Always speak slower than normal and move your mouth more to pronounce words. It helps us determine the words better. If we cannot understand you, please do not say "oh it doesn't matter", as maybe it matters to us. PLEASE, don't shout at me, it won't make a difference. If you do sig n language, please don't pressume that all deaf people know it,thats not the case. That’s just how I live, I'm sure everyone has their own way. Now I'd like to finish this by telling you about the things that many hearing people should really think about, I know many of you already do. The most annoying thing for me is people Shouting, very loudly at their children to be quiet, I'm lucky I can now hear my children and I really LOVE to hear them. Imagine how you would feel if you could never hear them again. Music- I really missed music, it's a wonderful thing. Imagine never hearing a tune again. Dancing- my past hobbies included dancing, I went to dance school from the age of 9. Yes, some of you must be thinking I am daft, what has dancing got to do with deafness. The answer, if I cannot hear the music how can I dance. Telephone- I could talk for England, some people moan "oh who's that now". When you don't have a choice it makes it upsetting at times. I have a special gift, I can hear sounds now, not everyone will be able to, but please just stop and think for a moment. We don't want to be deaf and nothing would please me more than to be able to communicate without asking you to repeat yourself. Hearing my sons voice for the first time will remain one of my greatest moments in life. I don't want sympathy I just want to be treated as you would like to be treated. I'm sure you would feel similar if you were in my circumstances. Thanks for letting me share this with you.

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        17.03.2001 01:11
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        Benign Intercranial Hypertension Benign intercranial Hypertension is otherwise known as Pseudotumor Cerebri, when referring to the illness most doctors would refer to it as BIH or PTC for short. Many people have asked me what it is, it's a very complicated and rare illness, it's not very easy to understand it all, however I shall try my best to explain. BIH/PTC It gets it's name because the symptoms replicate the symptoms of a brain tumour. What happens is swelling of the optic nerve causes intense headaches, the pain can really be extremely severe, I've been hospitalised due to the amount of pain I spent 2 weeks having pethedine, anti sickness injections and lumbar punctures, I also had severe visual disturbances. The symptoms are caused by high cerebral spinal fluid. The symptoms are- Headache- varying from person to person, some may only get a mild headache while others get a very severe headache, sadly I'm one of the unfortunate and get severe headaches. Nausea and Vomiting- many people get these symptoms, again it differs, it can be helped by taking anti sickness medication. Eye disturbances- I get double vision and blurred eye sight, your eyes are one of the main things to watch with PTC/BIH it can cause blindness. Ear disturbances- a whooshing or pulsating noise constantly in your ears. When I say constantly I mean 24/7 it never goes and considering I am also deaf it's very hard to deal with, it cuts out the very small sounds which I used to be able to hear with hearing aids. Stiff Neck- This is similar to having whiplash. Dizziness/unsteadiness- I have been called a drunk due to me staggering at times, the problem is people presume too much rather than thinking what else it could be. TREATMENT The treatment is something which I never want anyone to have to go through, there are a few children with this illness and the thought of them en during the treatment gives me strength in some ways but deeply saddens me that they have to have it in the first place. Medication can help such as high dosages of Diamox and Amitriptyliene, beta blockers can also help but not everyone can take them. Another treatment is surgery known as optic nerve sheaf fenestration , this involves going into the eye socket and making a cut to relieve the pressure. The other treatment is fitting a shunt which constantly drains excess cerebral fluid from the spine. The only real way to tell if a person has high cerebral spinal fluid is by having lumbar punctures, the lumbar punctures enables the doctors to get an accurate reading of how high a persons spinal fluid is, the fluid is drained from the spine and measured, so you are left with a normal amount of cerebral fluid. After this you have to lay flat for 3 hours before you are allowed home. It can be a very painful experience as I have found out. Some people never have to bother with further lumbar punctures but most of us do. I have been having lumbar punctures every month for the past 18 months, sometimes every 3 weeks. The doctors decided to see if a Ventricular shunt would help me. The only way to find this out is by doing Intercranial Pressure Monitoring- Believe me this sounds a LOT worse than it is. I was given a local anaesthetic , the doctor shaved part of my head, then I had a hole drilled through my skull, I was awake through out the procedure and it did not hurt, this was done on the ward and I was told I had a big advantage being deaf, I couldn't hear the drill ,which makes other people tense.. After the hole is made a probe is inserted into my skull, this is attached to monitor which gives the pressure readings all the time it is connected. This stayed in my skull for 24 hours. I've had this done twice now, the last time just a few weeks ago. The results shown that I was not suitable for a shunt, so my treat ment continues with regular lumbar punctures. I have to take high dose medications for the illness as well. The pain is always around, it's extremely hard to cope some days, but I do cope, I've been through the denial period, then the self pity, now it's a case of " I wont let it beat me". This illness is not one that people are aware of, it's rare but needs to be out in the open so people can understand. I made it my mission to find out everything I could about this illness, as I believe educating yourself means so much more, rather than relying on doctors who really cannot tell you much. The only way I have educated myself is by using search engines on the internet. There is not a lot of information about the illness for the UK, all my information, support and help has come through American web sites and PTC yahoo groups. I've started my own message boards for BIH/PTC I wanted to let people in the UK know that they are not alone, the message board attracted people from the states, but I have received emails from people in the UK with this illness, I've built up a friendship with them and we communicate a lot. It really does help having someone who knows exactly what you are going through. What ever illness you have, look for some support from people with the same illness, put a search in for forums or message boards, you don't have to be alone. Better still, start your own support group. Thank you for taking the time the time to read this long opinion.

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          17.12.2000 01:58
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          The British Deaf Association www.britishdeafassociation.org.uk The British Deaf association is a registered charity and also is the information site for help, advice, and has links to all resources relating to deafness or people who are hard of hearing, or people who need advice, anyone at all really. On the web site you will find information about Sign language Education Cochlear implants Links Jobs Regional info Latest news Services available Events calender At the moment as a special christmas gift you can download the BDA fingerspell. This will teach you how to finger spell in sign language. This is also given as the BDA want to raise deaf awareness. Another web site which should get mentioned is www.ndcs.org.uk National Deaf Children's Society official site. For children and parents everything you and your child would need to know is covered in the web site. It tells you all about the NDCS and has lots of different sections with huge amounts of resources. Childhood deafness Family services Regional information Publications How can you help News Kids club The kids club alone is a very useful source for information, and for your child to get in touch with children going through similar things, they have a penpal section and an art gallery section, as well as links for children. For information contact details are The National Deaf Children's Society 15 Dufferin St London EC1Y 8UR Switchboard number-02074908656 Fax number-02072515020 Info & Helpline-02072500123 Email-fundraising@ndcs.org.uk BRITISH SIGN LANGUAGE(this is a very useful site) www.britishsignlanguage.com British sign language com uses animated gifs to show you how to do the basic signs for BSL(british sign language). It is only used as a guide, by no means does it cover the whole of the sign language world. It is however one of the best that I have seen or used. At the moment there are over 400 words which you can choose to learn. Using this site is very simple and I think the simplicity of it makes it so easy to use.My 6 year old can follow the pictures without any problems. It's split into sections List of words-lots to pick from Groups of words-how to do groups of words Phrases-learn how to ask a deaf person "what is your name" or "what time is it" I have been taught an awful lot through this site, they also sell a cd with the signs on, ideal to teach children or work friends with. These are just a very few examples of some very good web sites relating to deafness. You do not have to know a person to learn sign language, or even learn how to lip-speak, you don't have to be deaf yourself, but you can guarentee that some time, some where, you will need to use it. The reason for my interest in deafness is because I am deaf, I wasn't born deaf and lost my hearing gradually over the past 6 years. It was nerve deafness and just one of those things, to lose communication is extremely frustrating, but by learning and teaching and educating yourself you CAN make things easier, not all the time of course but most of the time.

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          • Motability / Other Service / 1 Reading / 30 Ratings
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            01.12.2000 03:39
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            Motability is a registered charity, it was set up around 1978 with the aim to help people with mobility problems have a better quality of life, by way of supplying wheelchairs, powered wheelchairs and cars for anyone who is eligible. To qualify for the motability scheme you must be receiving the higher rate of disability living allowance or WPMS benefit. In return for your benefit you will have a choice of either- Leasing a new car for 3 years at a time Buy a new car over 4-5 years Buy a used car over 4 years Buy a powered wheelchair Buy a wheelchair A general explanation of this would be, you sign up with a motability dealer and choose the car you would like, some cars require you to pay a deposit which is non returnable and the full rate or part rate of allowance is used as payment for the car/vehicle. If you opt for the lease you will be able to pick a brand new car and replace it every 3 years with another brand new car. Also included is your insurance for 3 years and insurance for another nominated driver. All services are included as well as full breakdown recovery. Depending on the size and type of car/vehicle you like will determine the cost of any deposits. Most vehicles can be leased without deposits. Each dealer varies and it pays to look around at other dealers. A word of advice, if a sales assistant tries to give you a sales patter for a bigger car or bigger engine, the chances are a big deposit will be likely. Don't be afraid to ask. If you need to adapt a vehicle to suit your disability you may apply for a grant from motability to help pay for the adaptions, apply early as they have a lot of requests. The basic information and everything you need to know about motability can be found on the new motability web site at http://www.motability.co.uk Here is what you will be likely to find out at the web site- WHAT IS MOTABILITY Introduction Eligibility Grants Scheme partners Accredited suppliers ABOUT THE SCHEME Introduction Vehicle schemes Price guides Financial help HELP NOW Introduction How can you help How can your company help How can my trust help Site map NEWS & VIEWS Press releases Press office Exhibitions Lifestyle Bulletin board Motability also has a monthly magazine which includes lots of various information relating to the motability and disabled person. It gives you information on the latest events and has regular special offers only available to disabled people. I don't particularly like to end an opinion this way but I think this is something that needs to be said. I am in contact with a few people who use the motability scheme, quite often they are accused of robbing the state because they don't *LOOK* disabled. A lot of people are under the impression that if you are disabled you get a free car, this is NOT so. First if you are unfortunate enough to be struck down by a disability or an illness which make you disabled then you have no choice but to apply to the government for benefits, how else could you live? Secondly if you get awarded the highest rate of disability, which is hard to get awarded unless you have serious motability problems, to get a car you have to pay for this out of your benefit totalling to around £140.00 a month. Living as a disabled person makes you vulnerable as a mojority of people will only *LOOK* for a disability and if they cannot *SEE* a disability, they presume you are not disabled and should not be entitled to motability. People are not disabled by choice and do not wish to be this way, having a car through the motability scheme gives freedom to disabled people everywhere. Do you think it would be better for them to stay indoors just because they are disabled. NO, I don't think anyone would, because it can happen to anyone and I am proof of that. Life goes on and quality of life is important, not just to the disabled person but to everyone. Motability is a registered charity and is always looking for volunteers to help raise funds. Deatails are available on the web site.

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              19.11.2000 23:27
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              As asthma is on the increase and more and more children are developing it I thought all parents should know about support and help that is available to you. A very useful organisation is the National Asthma Campaign This is probably the best resource place for anyone with asthma, you can find different sections. All About Asthma This has lots of sub topics included in this section is- Questions-all your questions and answers Asthma News- All the asthma news Booklets-booklets that are available Factsheets-get factsheets explaining different areas of asthma Resources-all the resources available to you Search- can't find what you want? Search for it News Section contains all the press releases referring to asthma and all the latest news Research-Find out all about the research which is being carried out or which has been done. Topics under research include- Genetics Inflammation Prevention Treatment Triggers Get involved- this section gives you all the information about how you can help. It also contains information about Events, Fund raising and donations. Kid Zone This is a must for children with asthma, they have their own area of the web site which includes- Facts for Kids- designed for kids to understand about asthma and treatment Quizzes- special asthma quizzes that test how much a kid knows about asthma Asthma club- this is the asthma club for kids The web address is- http://www.asthma.org.uk/ Children's Asthmatic Support Trust The children's asthmatic support trust is a registered charity. It raises funds to buy vital medical equipment for children suffering from asthma. They offer an Emergency Nebulizer Deliver service to all health centres, doctors and direct to a childs home. The service is available to all children that need a nebulizer in the home, and works in order to make a child lead a better quality of life. The trust will not supply a nebulizer without written confirmation from a doctor. The Emergency service hours are- Monday - Thursday 9am-5pm and Friday 9am-1pm. If you would like further information here are the details- They are based in Nottingham and can be reached by phoning 0115 9497700/22 or by email- childrensasthmatic@prima.net These are just a couple of useful resources for asthmatics and parents of asthmatics. There are thousands of web sites on the net all dedicated to asthma, some are very good and some are awful. I've looked into a lot of sites and a word of warning, if you are told by anyone to try a different medication or to stop taking your normal medication you must NOT do this, you should speak to your GP. Too many people seem to think they have a miracle cure for asthma, when in reality they haven't. I've been told to try different methods and try herbs instead, thankfully I know that these methods do not work. We all get desperate at times, especially as a parent of an asthmatic child, to see your child gasping for breathe is heart wrenching, you feel completely useless, but you are not useless. One of the most important things to do when your child has an asthma attack is don't panic, a child will pick up on a parent who panics causing them to on most occasions get worse. Although asthma is on the increase new medication is being trailed and in the future, better medication will become available with less side effects and better outcome.

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                09.11.2000 19:59
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                When it comes to having to buy medical equipment most people don't know just quite where to start. As someone who has been there I think it is important for anyone to have the right understanding and knowledge, before trying to obtain various medical equipment. Seven years ago my asthma returned having previously disappeared for 12 years. I found myself in an extremely difficult and frightening position. My asthma returned with such a vengeance that I needed oxygen, nebulizers, ridiculous amounts of medication and on oral steroids. After being hospitalised for too long, in order for me to go home I had to have my own nebulizer. My GP bought me one and I agreed to getting it serviced regular and to look after it. It lasted 6 years until it gave up completely. I now needed a new one and didn't know where to start. After searching I found Clement Clarke. http://www.clement-clarke.com Clement Clarke are now an international company, they specialise in breathing equipment and have a vast selection at different prices. A few of the things they sell are- Peakflow Monitors- these measure the amount of air your lungs are moving.These are essential to see how bad a persons asthma is. Windmill Trainers- Ideal for children, it is a device that fits on the peakflow monitor to make sure the monitor is being used properly, if it isn't then the windmill trainer is designed to train how to use the monitor the correct way Flutter Mucus Clearance device- Widely used for cystic fibrosis, yet asthma sufferers can benefit hugely from this as it helps to clear the mucus which makes asthma worse. I use one of these it was recommended by a friend in the states who has severe asthma. This really works well. Able Spacer- Now this is a must for any parent who has an asthmatic child who uses a spacer to take their inhalers . The able spacer is pocket sized and ideal for children as well as anyone else. Clement- Clarke sent me a f ree able spacer for my 6 year old, what a difference it is, my 6 year old can use his own in-haler with the able spacer without any help from anyone. The 'normal' spacers are plastic and about the size of a 2 litre bottle of fizzy drink, carrying it round is awkward, the ablespacer is so small it will fit in your pocket. Nebulizers- Nebulizers are breathing equipment designed to deliver medication direct to your lungs, the medication mists up in a chamber and you breathe the mist in. These are life savers and essential in an asthma attack.. Unfortunately they don't come cheap. But what price do you pay for your life. A basic nebulizer would cost around £80-£100. But the faster, better designed and easier to transport nebulizers can cost up to £400. I'm totally dependant on mine, having it regularly serviced and keeping it clean will make it last longer. There are different sorts of nebulizers, including portable battery operated ones, and the new halo light, which is small, quiet and easy to use. Clement-Clarke have lots of information on their web-site, they don't have the prices, but will send you any information you want. They also sell accessories for nebulizer-the oxygen masks, chambers, leads, batteries, filter packs and year packs. A vital company for anyone with asthma or breathing related illnesses.

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                • Euthanasia / Discussion / 0 Readings / 41 Ratings
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                  26.09.2000 05:37
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                  I previously had decided not to write about this subject, but having read what other people have gone through I though I would try and write my thoughts. Some may not agree with me but that's fine, everyone is entitled to their own opinion. Be warned it is long. Euthanasia- What exactly is it? Also known as mercy killing. It is the practice of ending a life to release a person from an incurable disease, terminal illness or painful suffering. The term is sometimes used to refer to an easy or painless death. Voluntary euthanasia involves a request by the dying patient. Passive or negative euthanasia involves not doing something to prevent death, that is, allowing someone to die; active or positive euthanasia involves taking deliberate action to cause a death. A friend of mine had a relative who was in the last stages of terminal cancer, he was hospitalised and put on drips for fluids and pain. He knew he was dying but did not want to die in hospital bed. His family didn't have the room, means or needs to have him with them. This broke her heart, every day she would go and sit with him and just look at him, he was so doped up with all the drugs that he didn't know at times, who she was. The pain continued to increase and as he couldn't eat food they put a drip in to feed him, at times he would come round and say "why am I still here can no-one help me get out of this pain", each time he pulled the food drip out, he kept doing this all the time. Two and a half weeks of agony later he passed away, from starvation. My friend said that one reason she wouldn't let him stay with her was because she knew he would ask her to help him go, and she knew she would have helped him. He helped himself by starving because he knew it was the only thing he could do. This is positive euthanasia While the following is negative. Now I have a very different story. My grandmother passed away 7 years ago, she ha d a long battle with asthma and chest complaints and used oxygen, nebulisers and spent many times in hospital due to her bad chest. However, when she felt fine she would be the life and soul at a night out and always made you smile. She would have us in stitches, she'd dress up in feather boas and sequinned clothes and enjoyed a good drink. The last few months she hit an all time low, her chest was causing her discomfort and her breathing became affected . She was hospitalised after a bad spell and confessed to me that she was frightened, somehow this time was different. Her fighting spirit had vanished and I felt helpless. It was almost like she knew what was coming but was scared of the thought of it. The next day she deteriorated and went into respiratory arrest. The doctor tried to bring her round but only for a short time, he said "she has been through enough, let her go peacefully", and they did. We will never know if she would have fought back and be with us again. So, I have 2 very different stories but both relate to euthanasia. My personal choice has already made and is a choice that will remain with me and my family. All I can finish this off with is, if your closest relative or family member asked you to help would you refuse? It's so easy to yes, but you don't know unless you are put in that situation.

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                  • 192.com / Internet Site / 0 Readings / 40 Ratings
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                    24.09.2000 22:50
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                    Do you ever get fed up when you can't find a phone number, and think, do I have to call 192 and pay the ridiculous price? You don't need to phone up, you can access 192 through the www. Searching different options and areas are a few of the options available with 192. So if you have a free internet server or you are on a low cost internet access, the cheaper way to find out a lost number, or new number is quite simply by using 192.com. I actually stumbled on it while trying to find links to tracing some of my relatives. I'm probably the last person to know about it, but I am very glad I do know it now. It proved highly successful for me and gave me numbers of family who we were looking for. Obviously it turned up with the goods for me so I will highly rate it, however I'm sure other people have their own opinion of it. www.192enquiries.com

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                    • The NHS and the disabled / Discussion / 0 Readings / 47 Ratings
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                      20.09.2000 05:22
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                      This is indeed a subject which is extremely important and we should put a stop to the NHS deciding who can have treatment and who can't and stop it right NOW. Seeing that girl Jo sobbing her heart out after Craig from big brother announced he would donate his winnings to help her fund, it really touched me. And if dooyoo decides to do a special campaign, I would gladly join in. INSPIRATIONAL I would like to say that I have met people with down syndrome and they have amazed me. I have lost my hearing over the past 6 years and the first person to show me how to finger spell in British sign language was a 15 year old girl, who also has downs syndrome, she isn't deaf, but chose to learn it to communicate with people who are deaf. What an inspiration and what a lovely pleasant girl she was. MY PERSONAL VIEW The way the NHS is run is a disgrace, in my area the hospital is by no means a friendly place, it's grubby looking and not a very nice environment to stay the night in. It's not just disabilities that are affected it's treatment as well. My health is not good and I need regular treatment by way of lumbar punctures. In the states most lumbar punctures are carried out using fluoroscopy, this is like a scanner, similar to the ultra sound scanner used to detect pregnancy abnormalities. The purpose of the scan is to cause the patient, no pain, no discomfort and no hitting the spinal nerves, which is extremely painful. At my last lumbar puncture I asked about fluoroscopy and was told that I didn't come into the right category for it. Why not? because I am already being treated for another illness and because of the cost. HOW MUCH? This is the thing about the cost. The hospital would be only to glad to keep me in for a few days just so I can have a morphine drip or pethedine shots for the pain. I can't bring myself to do this because I am depriving someone of a hospital bed and my i llness will not go away but other people have a chance if treated. My doctor has now accepted that I will never be admitted to hospital unless it is absolutely necessary. WHY DO WE DO IT? It doesn't matter what age, race or disability a person has, we should all have equal rights, a disability does NOT mean that a person has no rights, but you find being disabled makes people think of you differently. The cost of treating a person should not come into it, if the treatment is available it should be applied to all that need it and not in classes based on age and disability. Please don't get me wrong on this, I have very different views on transplants which I beleive should go to the person who most desperately needs it. CAN WE SOLVE THE PROBLEM The one thing that really does make me angry in all this is the way the government spend the money. The national lottery as well, while it helps charities I would much rather it go to help the unfortunate people who need medical treatment to live, regardless of their age or disability. How anyone could award the millennium dome £90 million is beyond belief, how many operations and how much treatment could have been applied by gaining this amount of money. THE SOLUTION This is the hardest of all, who decides? who makes up these ridiculous rules? who has the right to tell a person they can't have treatment because they in not in the category? How do you define a disabled person? What are your thoughts? So the solution lays in the hands of the people who make all the rules above. It needs to end right now. A THOUGHT Anyone can get struck by illness and disability. With this I shall end with a personal verse. We start our lives the very same way One life, one chance, everyone's the same We're not just disabled we do have a name. We don't want to be ill or to have you to pay But We have no choice in this pre sent day.

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                      • How to Discipline Children / Discussion / 0 Readings / 25 Ratings
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                        20.09.2000 02:49
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                        Discipline and punishment are both rather touchy subjects, as everyone has their own ideas about how a naughty child should be disciplined or punished. My views changed around 5 years ago. I have 2 boys aged 9 and 6 and five years ago I would give them a gentle slap on the behind or a tap on the hand and talk to them about how or why I am doing this. Having been brought up in a family were the only discipline was to give us a good hard wallop, and send us to our rooms with out our tea, and then constantly throw our wrong doings into our faces. This all stuck, and as we have all (when I say we, I am referring to me and my 2 sisters) grown older and wiser we have learned to do things our own way, rather than repeat what we went through. I mentioned 5 years ago, this is when I started to see things from a very different point of view. Myself and family were visiting my husband relatives, my oldest boy, who was 4 years old at the time, was making a lot of noise, show me a 4 year old who doesn't like to make a lot of noise. One of the relatives (which I will not name, even though I'd love to) kept telling my son to shut up, I laughed and said "he's only playing", I never thought for a moment that he really was serious about shutting him up. To my horror, the relative jumped up, grabbed my son and gave him a really hard slap on his bare legs. My son screamed and a hand print came up immediately, I comforted my son and took him out of the room. I then lost my marbles and went ballistic at the relative, my husband came in a jumped to my defence. I was disgusted and told him that he was lucky I haven't called the police. The reply to this was "a good hard smack is the only way to teach a kid right or wrong". After arguing that a child making a noise is NOT wrong it's natural and also telling him that he makes more noise than my son and how would he like someone to smack him for making a noise, I knew he wasn' t listening, so I told him if he ever laid a finger on my kids again I will definitely make sure he is reported for it and he would not get away with it. What struck me most was, how could someone do this to someone else's child. Discipline, respect, punishment, abuse this all falls into the same category of teaching your children. My oldest cannot stand being near the above mentioned relative so it goes to show how much a child can absorb by going through what he did. I will not hit, slap or anything similar, and I truly believe the greatest way to teach a child about discipline is by talking and issuing more appropriate punishments, like stopping their favourite tv programmes or football or anything else they are passionate about. I always see it this way, a child is a human being, a unique person who will become our future, anyone who hits a child for doing things which are not naughty just annoying are quite plainly cowards. Some will class some things as naughty while I class it as learning to grow up, but again that's my opinion. Myself and sisters remember all the times we were disciplined but can't remember what we did that was so wrong that we deserved to be treated like this. My family and children are my life and I cannot even bare to think about anyone issuing discipline in the way of smacking. On a closing note,I think a baby and toddler need to be shown and watched, taking a firm tone of voice will have a much better effect. I don't agree that a baby or toddler should be smacked for touching something, they don't know right from wrong and it just teaches them that if someone does something wrong they get a smack or slap for doing it. Like I said at the top, everyone has their own ideas and ways, this is just my way.

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                        • themutual.net / Internet Site / 0 Readings / 23 Ratings
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                          19.09.2000 10:34
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                          I have been a member of the mutual net for a good few months now. I decided to register while taking up the offer of free shares, the shares are awarded to each new member at the current rate of 1000 shares per person. The shares are already listed on aim and after a 3 month period you will have the oportunity to cash them in. I'm not sure about the current share price. As well as getting free shares they also are an internet service provider. You download the connections within 10 minutes. You also get 25mb of free web space and 5 email addresses. The mutual net is based mainly on experts in different fields,they have a huge network of experts. You can earn extra shares by becoming an expert, the expert catergories range from arts & literature, entertainment, health, sports etc. To become an expert you need to find something that you are an expert on. Then you fill in a profile and write discussions and help advice notes if you don't do this you will be removed. It takes a lot of effort and can be time consuming Becoming an expert gains you an extra 10,000 shares and you have your own forum plus a chat facility. You also get 250 extra shares for each article you write. A recent addition is referring friends, you can earn extra shares by referring. A very good site which has given me lots of good advice which have come from the forums themselves.

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                          • More +
                            16.09.2000 21:42
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                            Vouchersmart previously known as Jackzbeanz is a beenz redemption site, and in my opinion one of the best. What makes it good is the way it is run, I have enquired a few times about various gift vouchers and certificates and received replies almost immediately. If you order a gift voucher or gift certificate you will also get emailed to let you know how the order is progressing. This is what customer service should be like. Customer services at many places, not just beenz redemption sites, I'm talking about the whole www are a disgrace and should take lessons off vouchersmart, who put them to shame. The gift voucher and certificate range at vouchersmart are very good, they range from holiday vouchers, books, high street shops, DIY, electrical, family, on line web certs, food and more. They also offer you the chance to redeem your beenz for floral deliveries, mobile top ups, stamps, magazines and now computer stuff. An in-law recently redeemed her beenz for Woolworth's gift vouchers, and how lovely to get them in a week, I know these would have been delivered sooner if it wasn't for the effect of the petrol crisis. Many other places takes weeks. The prices are low in comparison and the site itself is nicely designed and easy to use. I know I will be using vouchersmart in the near future and I would recommend them to anyone.

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                            • Boots Nappies / Nappies & Wipes / 1 Reading / 20 Ratings
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                              14.09.2000 05:19
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                              During my children's early years I shopped at Boots regularly, I bought my baby bath and soap products at Boots but I also had the privilege of trying out their nappy range. Boots are one of very few that sell nappies for the small baby, the smallest size was the one I needed for my baby. The premature range consisted of 2 sizes, I needed the smallest and prayed they wouldn't drop off him. My prayers were answered these nappies were fabulous, they were a touch too big but they never leaked, they never caused nappy rash and they were obviously comfy. The price was around £4 for a pack of 16-20, much cheaper than brand named nappies. I continued to use Boots nappies as my baby grew, as he got bigger and nappies got bigger I ended up having to change brands completely. Gone were the leak free days and he was always tugging at it. Quite disappointing for me, these nappies are cheap compared to some. At least Boots take the trouble to supply premature nappies, it can't be big business for them . Things may be different now, but I'm not about to find out for myself..

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                              • Boots Stores / Highstreet Shopping / 0 Readings / 17 Ratings
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                                14.09.2000 05:14
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                                Boots were my saviours when I had my second child, this is because he was born 6 and a half weeks early and only weighed 3 pounds, all the baby clothes I had bought and that people had bought for me were all far too big. We did have a mad panic trying to find clothes that would fit our special little boy, and thanks to Boots we did not have to search no more. I have to say that although the clothes fit perfectly they cost the earth, but you can't have a baby in a baby grow that drowns him. The cost was around £11 each and I'm going back 6 years now, the choices were nice and cheerful. Boots had a lovely little all in one suit for premature babies and I couldn't resist getting it, it was lovely, it cost £25 and he only wore it twice. The range of clothes for babies are good and the designs are cute, but you may find if you have a boy as he gets older your choices will be limited. People asked me why I didn't try mothercare or buy dolls clothes. In answer to that, mothercare had 1 item for premature babies in Pink, as for dolls clothes, has anyone seen a male doll which you can dress up? No, I haven't and even if I did I really do not think that I would be tempted to buy them. All the premature clothes I bought will get good usage as I donated the whole lot of them to the neo-natal unit of my hospital. So in the end it is money well spent.

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                                • trocamania.com / Internet Site / 0 Readings / 35 Ratings
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                                  14.09.2000 05:09
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                                  Trocamania is a reward scheme, it gives you trocas for doing certain things. You earn Trocas by surfing web sites Answering special troca questions Doing surveys Referring friends Spending at certain web sites Placing a banner on your web site The amount of trocas earned varies bit, every day you get 5 trocas for answering a daily question. New partners offer trocas and it is one of the easiest reward schemes I have done. The potential is not that great, and while you can earn in the UK the redemption sites are all American. It is good if you want amazon vouchers, I just received a $10 voucher and it only took a month, saying that it only takes a few minutes to do each day. It' s not like beenz were you go hunting on the various web sites, all the trocas are earned on the troca web site, making it really simple. One of the biggest ways to earn is referring you get 75 trocas for referring each friend. A $10 amazon.com voucher cost 833 trocas so it really depends on what you are looking for, it may be okay for some but not for others.

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